A Writer’s Life: Balancing Muse and Mundane.
When I think about being a writer. The cliché appears in my mind. I see Shelley sitting in her chair, with her laptop open, fully charged, excellent WIFI, and a steaming cup of coffee. Maybe a snack. Of course, there is an old typewriter that I never use, but it silently approves of my work.
My reality is quite different. Laptop √, WIFI? eh √, coffee √, thank God, and that old typewriter is likely mocking me. This is the reality, and that’s ok. It doesn’t have to be perfect. Most days, the radio is on, and I am pushing to write. I learned many things in a Veteran writing bootcamp that I was grateful to be a part of, but one thing sticks with me always: write something every day, it doesn’t have to be award-winning, and it doesn’t have to lead to speaking engagements.
I push myself to remember that writing is about that conversation between me and you. We relate to each other and say out loud what is in our imagination. I always try to remember that fiction or non-fiction is a real story or connection to ourselves and each other.
There are moments when I am writing that I have that cherished quiet focus, at 3-4 am, the world is quiet, my radio is playing perfect songs that only a DJ knows I need. Before the sun creeps out, my brain is like a runaway train. But soon the demands of life awaken, and finding that balance between work, family, and the dance between the vivid world of our imaginations and the sometimes-less-glamorous, but equally important, world of laundry cycles and grocery lists crash.
The juggling act of our identities and who I want to be can be at odds. I am a writer, yes, but I am also a parent, wife, entrepreneur, friend, and community member. Every role demands energy. My struggle with guilt often haunts me. I question every day if I am spending enough time with my family, when I am sneaking away to write.
In the middle of these challenges, there is great joy to be found. When I focus on the joy, my life reflects that. The act of writing itself can be a vital escape and source of renewal on a personal level. In this space, I have control, I control the narrative both literally and figuratively. This is where my voice is heard, and where I can explore the depths of human emotion and experience.
The things that have helped me most are being completely open about my experience and finding the balance of the support I need and the support I can still give to my husband and family. Creating this understanding is invaluable. Building a community of writers may sound daunting and may feel like an invasion on our already precious time slots. However, what works for me is online writer groups, mine is typically social media. I do miss the old Google Groups and old school hangouts online. Back when nobody was trying to take your identity or clone your page. Ahhh, the old days!
Ultimately, life, when intertwined with the everyday and the imagination, is witness to the passion and perseverance humanity is capable of. Finding the story between the world and my imagination is where I find my brain simmering. Embracing the messy reality of a life lived fully, knowing that whether a moment is extraordinary or mundane, they are the seeds of an extraordinary tale.
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